When I was a beautician, members of my profession referred to certain type of customer as a “Bread-and-Butter Lady”.

"Your paying members are your bread and butter. They're not people you take for granted. Your members deserve your respect."

Bread-and-Butter Ladies were older women that wanted old-fashioned service. They wanted their hair washed and their heads scratched. They wanted perms with the tiniest rods possible. They wanted their hair set with rollers and they wanted it dried under a dryer. They wanted us to comb their hair, tease it and give them the helmet look that went out of style in the mid nineteen sixties.

Some of my peers laughed at these women for being so out of touch with fashion. Some ran away in fear because a proper Top O’ Texas style took too much skill. Those among us that catered to these women were the ones that gave them the nickname we knew was an honorable.

We called them Bread-and-butter Ladies because no matter what, they showed up once a week. They were loyal. They paid us money. Their checks never bounced. While our more trendy clients flitted from salon to salon, our little old ladies came through. They were our bread and butter.

I love those ladies. More importantly, I respected them. I listened to their stories. I sympathized with their concerns. I listened to their advice. I saw their beauty. These were women that had been through World Wars and the Depression. These were women that managed to maintain a dignity supposedly enlightened females couldn’t imagine.

I respected these women because they asked nothing of me except that I do their hair the way they wanted. I respected them because without them, I couldn’t pay my rent. It was an honest trade of service for money. It was a relationship of mutual respect.

I knew a lot of cosmetologists that saw their clients as nothing but suckers. These jerks would bulldoze customers into services they couldn’t afford and didn’t want. Oh sure, those jerks made more money than I did but those jerks never had regular, long-term clients. I can’t tell you how many clients I picked up because one of my jerky co-workers had burned them.

I’m out of the hairdressing business now but the lessons I learned stay with me forever. The most important lesson was that you’ll never have customer loyalty if you don’t respect your customers.

Are you a paysite owner? Have you noticed that your members tend to cancel after the first month? Were you aware there are paysites owners that have had the same customers for years? Has it ever occurred to you that you could also have long-term paying members if you took the time to give them the respect they deserve? Do you even know what that kind of respect means?

Here’s what it means:

1. Keep the promises you made in your tour. If you state in your paysite tour that you will update every day, then update every day. If you state that your site contains nothing but gorgeous babes, then you better have nothing but images of gorgeous babes. If you promise personalized newsletters once a month, you’re basically lying if those newsletters are emailed whenever you get around to it. If you promise to keep your customer’s email private and that you’ll never sell your list, why in the hell would your sell your list of client emails?

2. Go easy on the Upsells. Upselling is when you advertise other sites and products within your member’s area. There’s nothing wrong with Upselling. It’s a great way to make more money from people that have proved they are willing to pay. Just the same, you have to respect the fact that your members have paid and don’t need a barrage of popups and ad banners mucking up their fun. Member’s areas are supposed to be enjoyable. Treat your members like members. They’re not freeloaders and if you treat them like freeloaders you disrespect them.

3. Customer service may is one of the privileges of membership and the cost of doing business. Say a member emails you because he’s having a hard time getting your videos to play on his machine. Do you patiently walk him through the process step by step or do you ignore his email? Do you create helpful online tutorials that explain troubleshooting methods for different platforms or do you leave your members in a lurch without support? Do you provide a phone number or live chat where you can be contacted or do conceal your contact info behind some form/email that you have no intention of answering? If you were ignored in such a way would you call it respect?

Your paying members are your bread and butter. When signups are down and times are tough, you can count on them to provide dependable, regular income. They’re not rubes. They’re not freeloaders. They’re not people you take for granted. Your members deserve your respect. Give it to them.